Spunk-less

I used to think that I was a person with a lot of spunk in her. And by spunk, I mean a quality of mind showing enthusiasm, boldness, energy, courage, determination and motivation (Wiki). Not seminal fluid as I just found out that spunk also means that....

I don't really understand why but I think I ended 2010 and started the new year with a lot of that spunk missing.

I feel that I lack soul sometimes. Emo-less and a bit distant. Robotic.
I am not sure if my thoughts or my feelings reflect on my facial expressions but I am hoping that it doesn't. I have got to master the art of a poker face. Seriously.

I wonder where all the spunkiness went to. I want that back...
I want that boldness which makes me be more confident of who I am.
I want that enthusiasm which makes me eager to do anything.
I want that energy which gives me the ultimate adrenaline rush.
I want that courage which guides me to take risks and face challenges.
I want that determination which drives me to success and fulfillment.
I want that motivation which gives me that extra push just when I need it.

I want that all..... back.

And I better get it back soon. *hugs myself*
I can do it.... :)

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