Down and Depressed

Haven't been feeling like myself lately.
I was feeling a bit down la. "Beaver's dam" it.
Cause I hate feeling like this.
I want to feel happy, cheerful and gay.
I don't want to be in a depressed or gloomy mood.
Sigh.

During my sister's wedding, I had to face some tactless comments from people, like "Oh, why is your YOUNGER sister marrying earlier than you? She potong you adi."
Personally, it doesn't matter to me. So I just say, "Oh no la, I'm just giving way to her." Then I flash them a super cheesy smile and laugh.

I got them from a few people, relatives, church people, dad's colleagues. Huh.
That was already bad enough la, when I received another comment, which my dad related to me on Tuesday. It seems that according to a colleague of his, I look too serious and fierce and that my look is going to scare any potential guys away.

She was referring to my expression at the reception table before the dinner where I was handling the guest list. Sigh...

I have never had anyone being scared of me. Even my school students and my dog bully me...
I was affected by what she said, truth be told. Cause I have never had this kind of comment thrown my way. It is not that I purposely want to look fierce or scary when I'm concentrating on something. I just happen to have THAT look.

I actually experimented on my colleague, YK. I came up the stairs and just looked at her. I didn't smile. She freaked...Oh dear. Lol.

So now, I am going to look on the floor or look elsewhere or read a book in my hand or pretend to be laughing into the phone. Anything to look distracted and not too serious.

I can smile but I want it to be sincere and warm. I could always try smiling at the computer... if that helps. Then people would comment that I look like a dork. Hahaha.

I think the comment got to me quite badly though I tried not to let it bother me too much.
But then again, she doesn't know me right?
I mean, I'm sure you people who really know me, know that underneath my so-called icy cold exterior lies a warm, fiery, enthusiastic and passionate person. Right? :)

Sigh...
I seriously need some cheering up.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

To Mr. KT

This post is written in honour of (no, scratch that), is written with the objective to give someone a piece of my mind. (Want my cerebrum or medulla oblongata?) Firstly, this person complained that I did not update my blog often enough. Then he said, "Kenny Sia updates everyday." Yeah right, it's not everyday la Tai Kor! And why compare me to him? I'm so tiny and puny in the blogsphere. Heh. Anyway, I'm super busy and super tired and has had no inspiration whatsoever to blog about anything till today. (Thanks to somebody...) Before I go into the second part, for all those who have yet to hear about it, (it's been publicized in her FB), my sister, Eileen is now formally engaged to her sweetheart of six, seven years. Congrats to my dear dear sister. Finally, eh? Hahah. The second part is related to this. Not referring to my sis, but me. Our good friend who complained that I don't update often, had the gall/balls (Grr...) to 'insult' me. When I sh...
Read more

Of Vampires and Werewolves

I've never really been an ardent fan of the Twilight series(boo...says you). And I have no idea why some girls go gaga over Edward the vampire. He looks so paste-y with the bloodshot eyes (yea yea he's supposed to look that way). And bleah! I think he looked way hotter in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire as Cedric Diggory . That, I can go gaga. But in Twilight??? The romance between Edward and Bella is fine. Romantic, mushy and cliched. Heh. But there's nothing much for me to shout about. (Sorry to the ardent fans, esp to my three sisters. Ha.) This year, the next sequel in this series is about to be released tentatively in November. Known as New Moon , the title is definitely appropriate since the werewolves play a bigger role this time. I didn't read any of the books in the Twilight series though my sisters finished the whole lot of it. So there's no doubt I have no idea of what's going on in the next book. But judging from this trailer of the next sequ...
Read more

My Future???

After thinking for a while, (ok, not a while but many whiles) I have finally decided what to do after I graduate (hopefully) in May this year. I have narrowed it down to two options. Sigh. Either I continue my studies and proceed wtih Masters (God, help me..) or I apply for this work and travel thing to US for six months. Will see how it goes... see which comes first. If it's the latter, I'd most probably miss my Convocation. If the former is first, the latter will no longer be on my list. We'll see we'll see. :) P/S: Applying for masters has nothing to do with what the government has allocated to help the economy.
Read more